Kanisha

Am called mwesigwa tonny henry, i would suggest that you forcus on God because what ever that is born of God over comes the world, do not lose heart God is in control and i strongly believe that were you are today is not your final destination, the best is yet to come your way. Am gonner keep in touch praying 4 your deliverence. for help contact me. mwesigwatonny@yahoo.co.uk

I also suggest you contact your local mental health center or crisis center. It is up to you and how much you want from your life. You do not need these people to make you happy. Be strong, get help and stand tall. God will be there for you, all you need to do is ask him. It is never to late to get started. Bless You

K, My dear, May I suggest that you contact your nearest mental health center. I feel you would benefit from counseling. There are many issues in your life that has not been dealt with. These areas include: childhood abuse by your sister, loss of your mother, lack of a father figure, etc. This would account for the continued destructive path and relationships in your life. When these areas are dealt with/healing begins the other areas in your life will fall into place. I wish you the best of luck.

would u consider moving to atlanta, ga

Life what is it? Are some of us put here to live life alone? Are some of us put to experience life with nothing but pain? You know some people have all the luck but not me. I think I was put here to have nothing but sadness. I like everyone else I want to be happy. But no matter how hard I try happiness seem to elude me. I was born in the small town of Chattahoochee Florida to Mrs. Vera Mae Davis. My dad was never in my life but at the time it really didn’t seem to matter. It was me my mom and my sister Kisha. I never had the finer things in life and sometimes not even enough food to eat. But mom somehow kept us happy. I remember one time mom cooked some chicken and she told us to eat all we wanted. Me and my sister ate every piece of chicken there was mom said she wasn’t hungry. She lied to us. I later walked into the kitchen to find her picking the bones of what we had left. I felt so bad I wished I had never ate anything. My mother used to go to work from 3 to 11 and she would leave me in the care of my sister. My sister would beat me and make me be her slave. I would have all kind of bruises but I wouldn’t tell mom because I was scared of her at the time. My sister was very cruel to me she would embarrass me in school just to see me cry. As a result of that I was picked on a lot. Sometime in middle school I ran into Martel Banks at first I didn’t like him but I soon grew to love him dearly. And I thought he loved me he didn’t go to my school so he knew nothing of them picking on me. I thought I had met to man I would spend the rest of my life with. But soon he cheated on me. That was my very fist heart break. I was so hurt I wouldn’t go outside for a month. As time went on my sister finished high school and moved away. It was just me. I became popular in school and I had mom all to myself. Life was pure bliss. Then I finished high school and mom became real sick and couldn’t work anymore. I joined the army to help with the bills even though I really didn’t want to. But as I look back on it if I knew how sick she really was I never would have left. I remember going to her job after school to help her out and rubbing her feet when she got home because they were always swollen. Anyway I did basic training and it was really hard but I made it. When she came to see me graduate I was so happy. Little did I know I would never see her alive again. She died when I was in AIT. I went to her funeral it was before Christmas. When my mom died I think a piece of me died with her. I got back to base and they wouldn’t let me go home for Christmas so they put me on suicide watch. I had to have two people with me at all times. I was so desperate for some one to love me. I met a man I really can’t remember his name. Well we went on a few dates and one day we went to the bank and found out how much I had in there. I got quite a but from my mother’s death. Well he said he said he wanted get married and I said ok but for some odd reason the court house was closed for no apparent reason. I thank God for that. Well I never saw him again. Anyway one day my two escorts said they wanted to go to the mall and I said ok. I didn’t take my purse and I had no money no ID no nothing. They thought it would be funny to leave me at the mall. Well I didn’t know how to call the base or anything. Two guys came up to me and offered me a ride home and I accepted. I was 19 from a small town and I really didn’t know any better. They said they wanted to stop by there house for a second. I said ok I knew nothing about rape or anything like that. They offered me something to drink and I said I don’t drink. So they offered me some orange juice and I said ok little did I know it had the date rape drug in it. The drug didn’t really take effect because I had a high immune system. I was able to fight them off and run to a local gas station. I felt so alone hurt and confused. Then I finished my training and I was sent to Korea. I didn’t know anyone so I mostly just went to work and stay in my room. As I was coming home one night tow girls asked me if I wanted to go to the club with them and I said ok what harm it could do. So I went and I had a very good time. They met up with their boyfriends and they said if I’ll be ok the walk back to base I said sure I’ll be fine. I walked back to base and to the path to the barracks there was a man waiting for me with a knife. It was the most horrifying moment in my life I thought I was going to die. Well after that I lost in and went crazy and I took an overdose to kill myself. I was taken to the hospital and that’s were I found out I was pregnant. I was hurting inside and no one to talk to. I couldn’t get an abortion in Korea because it was illegal. And I couldn’t go back to the states until I was 6 months pregnant then it would be illegal here. So I was pretty much stuck with her. I was still alone. I was sent to Ft. Hood Texas. By the time I had my baby I was processing out of the military. My sister offered to take the baby until I finished processing out and I said ok. Big mistake. My sister would call my boss everyday saying the baby needed this and the baby needed that. I sent her so much money I was living in my car. When I finally got home my sister had lied so much I almost got locked up. I thought things would get better when I got home but no one really cared for me or about me. I started working at the prison. My sister would get all my money by saying she was going to kick me out. I stayed broke. I met a guy who worked there and we were on the same shift so he spent all his free time with me. I thought I had finally met someone who loved me. I guess I have a bad sense of judgment. When I got pregnant he left. Again I was alone. While I was pregnant with y second child I cut my wrist in a fit of rage with my sister. My daughter was taken from me. I felt like another piece of my heart. I met another man and moved to Thomasville with him. After he took all he could get and I lost my job he left me too. I then got on unemployment and moved into a boarding house. My family couldn’t care less if I lived or died. Soon my unemployment ran out and couldn’t get food for me and my daughter. There was this man down the hall who said he would give me money if I slept with so idid to feed my child. Soon I got kicked of my room because I couldn’t pay rent. I then sent my daughter to live with some friends. I broke into the basement of a church to have some where to live. Soon I couldn’t take it anymore so I took an overdose. My dad came and got me from the hospital. I didn’t ask him to but he did. I went to live with him were I became his live in slave. Like anyone else I grew tired and moved back to Chattahoochee with a lady who used to live down the road from me. I had my son and became a slave again but what could I do I had nowhere else to go. My son got sick and had to go to the hospital. Then he got really sick and had to move to another hospital. But little did I know I would run into my first love. I was so happy and his mom even let me move in. I thought this was it I finally got what I asked for a family and a place to stay. But he has cheated on me more than i can count but if i break up with him then i will have to leave. I have to go I don’t much just a place to stay if you can help thank you. And if you can’t I understand but I still thank you for the thought. all i want is a smile and to be loved.